Saturday, February 9, 2013


Today I ended up talking and thinking about the options of talking about versus holding something inside and not talking about it.  I have done both, numerous times.  Holding something inside feels the same as trying to close up a physical wound before it is ready, it swells, gets more painful and festers.  The pain and hurt do not heal.  On the other hand, talking with a trusted individual, who will simply listen, rather than trying to fix or correct me,  permits healing.  A scar may remain, but things feel better and it is possible to move on with life, unencumbered.

The latter is a love based approach, the former is fear based.  Having tried both, I prefer the latter.

Monday, February 4, 2013


I went to a super-bowl party today, my first.  I did not watch the game, but I did watch some of the pre-game festivities and also the people watching the T.V.  I was struck by the obvious passion people felt, particularly the game participants on the television.  That passion was a wonderful thing to observe, and feel in the case of the other observers in the room with me.  The object of their passion, the game, was silly, in my opinion, but the passion was quite real and delightful.  The tears, facial expressions and general body tension of the people on the screen were quite something to behold!

I also felt extremely uncomfortable due to the emotional chaos, intensity of feelings and the presence of the T.V.  I suspect that it was my last super bowl party!  I did spend most of the time in a small gathering away from most of the people and the T.V.  That part was pleasant.  Generally, I feel more connected and less chaotic in small groups.