Today I ended up talking and thinking about the options of talking about versus holding something inside and not talking about it. I have done both, numerous times. Holding something inside feels the same as trying to close up a physical wound before it is ready, it swells, gets more painful and festers. The pain and hurt do not heal. On the other hand, talking with a trusted individual, who will simply listen, rather than trying to fix or correct me, permits healing. A scar may remain, but things feel better and it is possible to move on with life, unencumbered.
The latter is a love based approach, the former is fear based. Having tried both, I prefer the latter.