What Works For Me

  Right now I feel the need of lots of quiet, meditative time, a need that is supported by my wife but not my culture or my own head at times.  I often feel bombarded by a culture that tells me I will feel less stress if I do more, own this or that, achieve fame or have more money.  In my life I have tried those things and found they did not work. Silence, love, service and humility have worked and cost me nothing other than focus.  Noone profits in terms of money — yet I feel rich.  “From everywhere, it seems, we are bombarded with the idea that our nature is innately violent, that our chief preoccupation is with our sexuality, and that our main purpose in life is the acquirement of ever more nifty possessions.......Indeed, it is only through the practice of inner silence that we can begin to disentangle ourselves from our culture and its illusions. (Silence: Our Eye On Eternity, by Daniel A. Seeger)

Humility

  In the last several entries I have mentioned some of the beautiful and healing events in my life within the last decades.  I have attributed them to love and the power of love.  In my experience the words or beliefs (Buddha, Jesus, God, Krishna, Higher power) behind that love make no difference.  The presence and power of that love is important.  It is also important for my humility to always remember that I am not its source, but a willing and grateful conduit.  “A mystical touch is a deep, intimate contact-union-experience of God in one of His attributes such as power, light, goodness, beauty, or joy.” (Fire Within by Thomas Dubay, S. M.)

White Crows

  Five years after I was diagnosed by a leading expert in my kind of disability, he told me that I was the only patient of his who was getting better.  He asked what I was doing so I explained my holistic practices.  In response he said: “I don’t know what you are doing but keep doing it”.  Then about five years ago my primary physician was having difficulty finding the correct amount of a new medication for my hypothyroidism.  I got fed up so I stopped the medication and worked on healing my thyroid using similar techniques to those I had used before.  I knew this approach was risky and I certainly do not recommend it — but it worked for me.  At first my doctor thought I had simply figured out the right amount of my new medication so I told him I had healed it.  He later commented that it was surprising it had healed spontaneously.  I am left with a question I heard many years ago: “How many white crows do you have to see before you are convinced that all crows are not black?

My Own Healing

  Back in 1988 I was diagnosed with cerebellar degeneration a chronic degenerative neurological disease which would typically result in death.  This diagnosis came from Dr. David Zee, a Johns Hopkins Hospital neurologist and seemed to be accurate and encompass my symptoms.  I was in extreme pain, using crutches and in physical therapy learning how to crawl.  I also began to practice Attitudinal Healing together with Buddhist and Hindu meditative techniques, basically using the power of love and the mind-body connection.  After several years Dr. Zee commented that I was his only patient that was getting better.  I have continued to get better in some ways and gotten slowly progressively worse in others (most notably in my speech).  I have also cured numerous other conditions using the power of love.  I am 74 and doing much better than expected, so I think I will continue!

Holistic Healing: The Power of Love

  I realized a few days ago that despite professional and personal advice to the contrary, I have no use for most conventional or mainstream neurologists.  I am an exception to the norm.  I have been successfully using love-based holistic practices for the last thirty-five years since my diagnosis (cerebellar degeneration, a chronic degenerative neurological disease).  I am doing much better than expected, according to my diagnosis and have accomplished things considered impossible, all using the power of love.  It does not help me to be re-diagnosed and have the last thirty-five years ignored or discounted. On the other hand, I would be delighted to talk with a neurologist who acknowledged and incorporated my past.

Beyond Forgiveness

  I was raised in a “quietly” violent and abusive alcoholic home.  I write quietly because there were no police or hospital stays and minimal physical marks.  The source of the violence was my father.  He beat me at times until I turned twelve and was strong enough to stop him. I should also admit that I provoked him.  I also now believe that you should never hit a child.  Through the recovery process I managed to forgive him several years ago.  Then, shortly before he died from Alzheimer complications, I went to visit him in the nursing home where he was staying.  He did not recognize me as his son and had limited cognitive ability.  During that visit God covered us with an umbrella of love and we talked quite intimately for a couple of hours spirit-to-spirit.  I felt nothing but unconditional love for the man before me and I realized that within unconditional love there is no need for forgiveness.

Change

  For the last several days I have had the uneasy feeling that things were not right in my life and this morning through meditation I realized that I was in the midst of change.  Nothing major or earthshaking but simply that it is time to get past some negative ideas about myself and also that I need to do things differently, though I’m not certain what.  It is clear to me that it is time to sit quietly and mentally sift through my own attitudes and behaviors.  If something feels wrong to me, I can then make the needed changes.  As with many things, this sounds simple and easy — it is neither.