Saturday, May 7, 2016
I am very much aware that I need guidance to sort out and then put into words what is really going on in day to day life. Initially I learned about the power and importance of love through my own meditation, the comments of various spiritual leaders such as Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj and similar comments of early mystics and religious leaders. More recently I learn of the same attitudes and ideas through quantum physics. It is quite apparent that various forms of energy such as love or fear underlie what we consider to be physical reality, what Conrow Coelho calls "the plenum taking form". Long standing spiritual beliefs and now science are saying the same thing, that the underlying energy impacts what we know as reality.
Friday, May 6, 2016
Today was a "split wood, carry water" sort of a day, meaning I just carried out the daily tasks that were in front of me. I did my exercises, went to a recovery meeting, did a lot of necessary paperwork, did some weeding and took a nap in the middle of the day. I was very aware of some discomfort due to being in transition regarding much of my life and some depression and sadness from grieving my sister’s recent death. For me it is a time of doing the next right thing, plodding forward.
Thursday, May 5, 2016
When I commented yesterday that from an eternal perspective there was nothing to forgive, what I meant was that looking at life through the lens of unconditional love the hurtful, destructive and negative actions we do are a part of our growing towards love. From a human perspective, the act of forgiveness is very important. In my case my father beat me and expressed his rage toward me as a child. As an adult I went through a lengthy and very important process of becoming aware of the impact of his anger on me and finally forgiveness, realizing that he did the best he could. On my last visit with him I felt only love and, from within that love, I realized that there was no need for forgiveness.
Wednesday, May 4, 2016
Through the process of being alive and growing towards love I have done many hurtful, destructive, negative actions toward myself and others. I have also experienced those actions being done to me. I have gone through a process of first becoming aware of those negative actions and then forgiving them. Those actions were simply the product of doing my best at the time, and not knowing better. Finally, using the idea of "Eternal Perfection" put forward by Williamson and my own similar meditative realization, I have become aware that there is nothing to forgive, we are all humans doing the best we can.
Tuesday, May 3, 2016
Today was a quiet day of grieving for the death of my sister and recovery from a draining weekend. My sister had a cardiac arrest a little over a week ago, was in a coma and died a few days ago. I suspect that her spirit is now glad to be free of the constraints of a physical body. It is time for me to feel the loss. I have felt angry, sad and a bit depressed, not particularly pleasant but part of life and it’s good to be alive.
Monday, May 2, 2016
I just got back from the retreat weekend I led. The weekend went very well & I am exhausted. I will be taking it easy for the next few days. The theme for the weekend was "connections" and we also talked a lot about the possibility of my moving. I used a variety of exercises from my book to give them experiences of connecting to everything and everybody. We worked with everything from grains of sand and shell fragments through birds and other living things. Everyone cooperated and many wonderful things were experienced.