Not In Charge

I was reading an account of a dream I had a little over a year ago in which I, symbolically, go through a variety of life stages and finally get to a stage of being totally lost in a wilderness area, a symbolic statement of how I felt emotionally and spiritually.  In the dream, I was only minimally uncomfortable with being lost.  The main difference between then and now, is that now I am totally comfortable with being lost.  I am clearly not in charge of where my own life is going.  I am in charge of the actions I take today, my next step.  As I said to Maria tonight “I know we own our house, but I feel like it is a rental”, a valid statement for the rest of my life as well..