Gratitude

I am approaching the anniversary of my becoming illegal drug and alcohol free and, as I always do this time of year, I am reflecting on my journey these past thirty-five years.  On one hand I have a wonderful life with a very strong connection to the force I call God.  I readily acknowledge that I have gotten many gifts and I am extremely grateful for the person I am today.  I know that I needed to go through all of the challenges I have had to face in order to become me.  On the other han I would not wish that history on anyone.  I had better stick with the gratitude!

Self-care

I noticed the last few days that I was getting angry at little, silly things like when I splattered very sticky cranberry sauce over a large area on the kitchen floor — twice, so I knew I needed more self-care and rest.  Today I did exercise and I went to a recovery meeting but I took the rest of the day off.  I rested, meditated and watched two silly but entertaining movies.  It surprises me how easy I find it to ignore or override my own needs.  I really need to pay attention and take the time needed if I am to be at my best,.

Listening and Acting

I have been keeping a journal for many years because of my realizing how much it helped me stay on track as the person I wanted to be.  In recent years I have put it on line and realized that others might benefit as well.  My procedure was that when I got up to pray and meditate in the middle of the night I would sort back through my day and sometimes one of my files of quotes until something stood out to write about.  The article would then write itself and I would not know for a few days if the main recipient was myself or someone else.  Then one night I got no inspiration — so I wrote nothing.  It then became frequent that I got no inspiration so I would skip a day or so.  More recently my computer crashed causing an extended hiatus and the need for a new computer.  The most recent development is that I have been told to stay off the computer at night and simply pray and meditate.  I now write these entries in the afternoon when a topic presents itself.  I realize now that this has been an exercise in listening and acting accordingly.