Not In Charge

I just sent in my final approval of the cover mocks for my book, significant since that was the last action prior to its actual publication.  The book could be a total dud, very popular or somewhere in between, which is more likely.  I am passionate about its contents & hope that it has an impact, however large or small.  As Ray Stevens once wrote “I play my piano and sing my little song.”  The outcome is not mine to determine.  I am not in charge.

A Matter of Choice

I would like it if judgment or criticism toward me had no impact on my feelings, that I simply received it objectively, took any necessary corrective action, and felt no personal injury.  The problem with feeling personal injury is that I tend to get defensive.  Unfortunately, I am not that person but I can and do choose to not act defensively.  What I do is feel the feelings, let them pass, shift into a loving and forgiving feeling and go about my day.

Presence

Many years ago I asked to see the world the way God does and since that time I have worked very hard toward that goal, learned a great deal and tried to remain teachable.  I have come to realize what Saint Faustina so eloquently wrote; “When a soul has come out of these tribulations, it is deeply humble. Its purity of soul is great.  It knows better without need of reflecting, as it were, what it ought too do at a given moment and what to forbear.  It feels the lightest touch of grace and is very faithful to God.  It recognizes God from afar and continuously rejoices in Him.  It discovers God very quickly in other souls and in its environment in general.”  Basically I see and feel the force or power I know as God in everything I do each day.

A Good Day

Today I received the final mock-up of the proposed covers for the book I am publishing, very exciting.  The book is a major part of my efforts to “change the world”, a grandiose effort but there it is.  I have realized the truth of Williamson’s words when she commented that “Your playing small doesn't serve the world.  There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.  We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.” I also went to the movie “Ant-Man” today, very entertaining, creative and totally forgettable.

Unspeakable Joy

Last week my doctor asked me what I did for fun and I hesitated since many of the activities that most people consider fun involve physical activity and are, therefore, not possible for me.  However, through my connections with others, prayer and meditation, I do experience what many call “unspeakable joy” many times each week, often daily.  My last experience of welling up with tears was yesterday, over the experience of giving a green, stuffed, fuzzy dragon named Bixby to a friend and her appreciation of him.

Loving Response

During the last several weeks I have been very aware that when we choose to act out of that Source/God or love part of each of us, it changes everything.  For example, the atmosphere and all of the people change their actions in the face of a response of forgiveness and love to acts of terrorism.  I am reminded of the comment “There is no way to peace.  Peace is the way.”