Practice

When I get up in the middle of the night to pray and meditate rather than focusing on my breath in order to bring me into the present, I focus on the intense, physical sensation of unconditional love, a warm glow just below my heart center. I was shown this feeling many years ago during a near-death-experience and now carry a lesser degree of it with me during the day. At night I let the feeling grow and then use that feeling as my starting point for healing, spirit communication or just reviewing that day’s events. I consider it a gift from God, Love or the Absolute. "There are, says the saint [St. John of the Cross], encounters with God such that the devil cannot possibly counterfeit them, nor can one’s imagination create them. Some are so indelibly imprinted in the center of one’s being that they can neither be described nor forgotten."

Self Care

For the last couple of days I have been taking a break from my work with spirits in order to focus on meeting my own needs. For the last few days I have just been doing very "earthly" things like exercising, cooking, yard work and napping. That felt right and I needed a break. I have also been doing a lot of prayer, meditation and asking for guidance. The comments of Elizabeth Ostrander Sutton come to mind: "I cannot create when I choose the path that separates me from God. But when I consent, I soar for I have opened the door of creation." I continue on my path.

Perfection

I wrote yesterday about the disillusionment I typically have gone through in uncovering my own "frailties and weaknesses" followed by my joy at cherishing them as part of me. The human view is that any weakness is a sign of imperfection, that perfection means no frailties and weaknesses. I now understand that this view is flawed and that God’s view is that each of us is perfect within our own imperfections. In the words of Anthony De Mello, "God weaves perfect designs with the threads of our lives," he said. "Even with our sins. We can’t see this because we’re looking at the reverse side of the tapestry."

Awareness

For decades now I have been seeking, learning and growing, quite a process. In most (all?) cases I go through idealized ideas toward disillusion, increased awareness and joy. I had an idealized view of what it was to be human and Charlie followed by introspection, alcoholism, disability and, finally, joy and fulfillment. During my path I stumbled across numerous frailties and weaknesses that I now cherish as parts of me. I have gone through a similar process and sequence with my beliefs about Native Americans, believing them to be very spiritual, discovering their humanness and coming to embrace the whole picture. I am now going through the same process regarding the world of spirits. "Jesus said, ‘Let the one who seeks not stop seeking until he finds. When he finds he will become troubled; when he becomes troubled, he will be astonished and will rule over all things.’" (gospel of Thomas)

Solution?

Yesterday I wrote about Parker J. Palmer’s comment in Healing The Heart Of Democracy: The Courage To Create a Politics Worthy of the Human Spirit that it is important to resolve the tension or conflict inherent in the democratic process with heart or love. He also quotes Benjamin Friedman as saying "When material progress falters........people become more jealous of their status relative to others. Anti-immigrant sentiment typically increases, as does conflict between races and classes; concern for the poor tends to decline." Well, material progress has faltered and Friedman’s words have come true. I believe that the solution to this situation is something like the spiritual and loving approach I write about in my book, Three Simple Questions: Being in the World, But Not of It and I will do what I can to promote it.

Resolving Conflict

Today I met with a reading group I belong to. We are reading Healing The Heart Of Democracy: The Courage To Create a Politics Worthy of the Human Spirit, by Parker J. Palmer. He writes about the importance of resolving tension or conflict with "heart" or, I would say, with love and I agree. I readily admit that resolving tension in this way requires effort, focus and attention but it also results in joy and, often, togetherness. As Williamson points out "God never loses His enthusiasm for life and neither should we." She also comments about resolving tension in this way when she writes "Seeing the light and then living in the light, we will ultimately become masters at the power it bestows."