I Am

During my meditation a few years back, though I did not know what to call that part of me, I encountered a part or sense of self which was free of the encumbrances of the ego or this physical body, a part that was "with" God and was eternal. The experience was and is memorable and exhilarating. I then discovered that a Hindu spiritual leader named Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj had very nicely described the same "There is only one state, not two. When the "I amness" is there, in that consciousness you will have many experiences, but the "I am" and the Absolute are not two. In the Absolute the "I amness" comes and then the experience takes place. In the Absolute there is no individuality, no memory that I am this or that, but there is continual stirring." Since then I have learned to return to, identify with and carry that part in my daily activities. Recently I also found out that Jesus referred to that part in the gospel of Thomas "[Jesus said,] ‘Blessed is the one who came into being before he came into being.’"

Kingdom Of God

To me, the main important take home message from my comments of the last few days and life experience in general is that the "kingdom of God" is available to all, if one is open to it, will allow it and strive for it. The words used, the religion or spiritual path used or the belief system employed make little or no difference as long as they lead to service, compassion and love. The unconditional love of that force is there waiting for us. For me, this was a glorious realization. "The kingdom of God is not coming with signs that can be observed, nor will they say; ‘Look here it is!’ or ‘There it is!’ for the kingdom of God is within you." (gospel of Luke)

God's Love

Looking back I can see that many of my choices have been guided and that I have been protected from potentially dire consequences during times that I denied and did not believe in anything of a spiritual nature. For example at sixteen I rolled a car into a stream bed and was ejected over the steering wheel and through where the windshield had been, then landed on my face about twenty feet away with only cuts and bruises. A few years later I drove across the country in a car that, according to knowledgeable mechanics, should not have mad it. I drove through the Rockies on roads that were unknowingly closed and parked on slopes so I could start my car in the morning. At one point I even pulled into a gas station that was closed for the winter on a closed road at two or three in the morning and the owner happened to be there and gave me gas. Much later in my life right after my diagnosis I became severely depressed and drove my car across busy, fast moving traffic not caring if I lived or died. I realized quickly that I was done living and was then moved to safety. These are only a few examples but are more than luck. My point is that even when I was on a dark path and either denied or did not believe in anything, I was being cared for and protected by the force I denied.

Choices

I wrote yesterday about the unconditional Love of God especially toward the "silly" choices we make, as humans. By silly I am referring to choices that are short-term, self-destructive, hurt others or hurt this planet that we depend on. I have personally made many such choices, always in an effort to feel better about myself. I knew no better and like a growing child, was simply doing my best. I now realize that is part of the human experience and help guide others through the process, much the way I have been guided. "We can cultivate an environment among us which will foster one another’s spiritual growth by directing and redirecting intention and attention to God; by discouraging what draws us away; by loving support for each other in the vicissitudes of our utterly human lives; by respecting and cherishing the uniqueness of each life." (Patricia Loring)

God

The God I know and connect with through prayer and meditation every morning is a loving force that I can channel and use in my daily life, as long as I stay humble. He/she/it is absolute, unconditional and thoroughly embraces the human experience. Absolute meaning there is only Love there, no judgment, criticism or condemnation. Unconditional meaning just that, everything is witnessed through the lense of Love. Embracing the human experience meaning having Love, understanding and compassion when humans make silly choices because of free will. That force gives me daily support and guidance as long as I get silent and listen. "According to Thomas, Jesus says that this primordial light not only brought the entire universe into being but still shines through everything we see and touch."

Ministry

Maria, my wife, and I moved from AZ to MD as part of our effort to change things in the manner I mentioned yesterday. We felt a "calling" to do so. I have been spreading love and peace in the meetings I attend and with everyone I meet or work with. Today through meditation and visualization I attempted to expand the umbrellas of loving energy around this house and the Friend’s meeting house. That action feels like the right path for my ministry right now. "It requires even more discernment to discover whether the ministry called for from a particular individual in a particular instance requires prophetic speech, humble and hidden activities, bold and dramatic action, professional service or some ,novel and previously unimagined course."