Perspective

When I work with someone, the aspects I focus on are the progress and the presence of attitudes and awarenesses that were not there before.  For example, I tend to focus on the development of love, understanding and compassion, together with the action of doing more service work.  My approach is very love and strength based.  On the other hand, some other people notice what is missing, behaviors and attitudes that have still not developed.  For example, the same person might still be relatively entitled, self-centered and lazy.  Both views are totally accurate and valid.  My preference is obvious.

Integrity

Today, I was talking with a fellow recovering person about integrity, a subject and way of life that is very important to me.  I watch other recovering people and note that they will say nice words, especially during our meetings, and then behave differently.  It is important to me that I “walk my talk”, in and out of meetings and when noone is looking.  One of the points I made today is that integrity also means that if something does not fit in my life, is not honest and love based, I do not participate in it.  This sounds easy and simple when I write about it, but I do not find it so.  I also get consequences, the most common is being told that I am not a “team player”.

Rooted In Love

I lead a fairly busy life, often going rapidly from one thing to another through much of the day.  During the day I find that I need to pause periodically and remind myself of the importance of things like God, love, compassion & understanding, remind myself to “be”, not just “do”.  I depend on the quiet time of prayer and meditation each morning to keep me firmly rooted in the importance of things like God, love, compassion & understanding.  Without that special time, I tend to lose track and my day does not flow as smoothly.  Unfortunately, I find it easy, even compelling, to become a “human doing”.

Healing Hands

This afternoon I was performing a healing on Maria’s eyes and I started to heat up even more than usual, very much the same as recently when I do self-healing in the morning.  I found it necessary to take my shirt off, in order to avoid over-heating and the subsequent session was very strong.  There was an intense feeling of the healing power of God/love passing through me and I found the session (perhaps ten minutes) to be exhausting.  The process felt like I was accessing or allowing a power that I had not before, that I was using a part of my brain/heart/soul which had not been used before.

A Love Based Life

Today, I have been feeling a great deal of self-doubt over what seems to me to be a simple and obvious choice of living a life based on love rather than fear.  Having lived with both attitudes, I now prefer a life based on love, or am I just being delusional to even think I am doing that and why are so few others interested.  I am fine with my life as it is, and do not own or want things I do not have.  I observe other people destroying our world and hurting each other and I am good with their choice, while also wishing and doing everything I can to make it different.  I find it totally understandable that people (including myself!) do silly and addictive things and love those people anyway.  Sigh.

Understanding Is Not Required

Maria and I drove east of Flagstaff to the Twin Arrows area, south of the location of the casino to a ridge on Hopi land that had several ruins.  As we approached and Maria slowed the car, I, involuntarily, went into a state very much like, what I call, zoning or deep meditation, a trance state where I am more receptive to the spirit world and less connected to physical reality.  The reason for my shift in perception was not clear to me except that it was important and that I became more receptive to the information passed to me, very strange, but it has worked so far.  Understanding is not required.

Distractions

Conducting my day-to-day experiences from within love or with God, whichever way you wish to phrase it, is a wonderful, magical experience.  I wish all could have that feeling.  Unfortunately, having that feeling seems to require discipline and a willingness to resist some of the attitudes and activities that are promoted in this culture.  My personal experience as well as that of many others indicates that indulgence in the numerous distractions presented in this culture, like excessive material possessions and over involvement in drama actually detract from the growth of the seed of love or God.