Speaking My Truth

I feel the need to sort things out, specifically my interactions with others and my role within those interactions.  I want more clarity.  Because of my history and training, I have fairly extreme insights into the human condition.  My training, experience, level of awareness and awakening all contribute to grasping the human condition on the earthly plain.  My conscious contact, guidance and near death experiences provide me with a more eternal view.  Taken together, I have been gifted with much understanding, though not complete and still developing.
There are many people who appreciate and even depend on my insights, while others do not.  I tend to speak my truth “quietly and clearly” (Ehrmann) much of the time.  I try to be objective and unattached, while speaking my truth, but I also realize that all of the information I have been given is filtered through my own biases.  Perhaps, speaking my truth is my role right now!

Holistc Approach

My doctor tells me that the ultrasound indicates that my thyroid is OK.  She is concerned because both my TSH, produced by my pituitary, and my T4, from the thyroid, are a bit low, according to the normal range.  Generally, when the level of T4 is low, more TSH is produced, telling the thyroid to increase its production of T4.  Therefore, they should not both be low, simultaneously.  The simplest explanation is that my body does not need more T4, an explanation that my doctor rejects, since, according to conventional thought, all humans need a certain level of T4.  I have to be very careful since my body is not necessarily normal and reliance on allopathic medicine has not served me well in the past.  What I try to do is take the information provided by my doctor and integrate it into my holistic, health oriented approach.

Love Versus Co-dependency

I went to the movie “Mud” with Mathew McConaughey today.  The movie depicted various relationships demonstrating love in its pure, selfless, form and also many relationships which demonstrated love mixed with co-dependency, lots of ego and self-interest.  Watching the various relationships in the movie, I was reminded of just how destructive co-dependence has been in my own life.  Because of these various relationships, the movie was either disturbing or beautiful at different tines, quite realistic.  Having now given up my attachments to various things, I feel and act on love in its pure form much of the time.

Doing The Right Thing

My wife is visiting her mother, back east, and we talk regularly on the phone.  A secondary reason for the visit is the possibility of her getting a job in the east and us moving back there.  We both acknowledged on the phone tonight that moving back there in order to chase a paycheck, insurance and retirement would not make sense.  However, moving there because it is “the right” thing to do does make sense.  That is, if our presence there would have some sort of cosmic significance it does make sense to move.  If there is some sort of higher purpose to being there, we would both like to go.  As far as I know, that sort of question can only be answered through meditation, so I should sit, be quiet and receptive.
I have difficulty in meditating about anything where I have emotional involvement, some attachment to outcome.  However, through meditation it seemed clear that it is best for us to stay in Flagstaff.  We shall see.

Spiritual Path

I was reminded today, that one of the roles I play is to assist others in their spiritual quests, their spiritual paths.  I can, figuratively, turn around on my own path and say “try going this way”.  This is a role that is a vital part of my life.  Making a connection with people and then helping them find their own path is something I am quite passionate about and a role that requires that I have genuine respect and love for whoever I am connecting with.  The role feels important to me.  I think it important that, as a species, we advance spiritually and emotionally, perhaps then we can adjust to the technological and scientific changes that have already taken place.