I was reminded today of a change in perspective that many of my clients go through. They finish the 6 month program at B2B and then return home for a few days. When at home, generally they can clearly see the dysfunction in their family for the first time, usually lots of insecurity, triangulation and taking things personally. Generally they fight me vigorously when I initially bring these things up, a few months previously. They usually disagree and can not see the problem. Over the next months they become relatively direct and honest and tend to see the dysfunction as needless, hurtful drama. They come to love their family members even more, and see what is going on as very human. There is no judgment or criticism, just loving, accurate observation. They frequently recognize that their parents and/or older members of the family are unlikely to change, and become good with that. Quite a change for them and quite something to watch!
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Love and a Change in Perspective
I was reminded today of a change in perspective that many of my clients go through. They finish the 6 month program at B2B and then return home for a few days. When at home, generally they can clearly see the dysfunction in their family for the first time, usually lots of insecurity, triangulation and taking things personally. Generally they fight me vigorously when I initially bring these things up, a few months previously. They usually disagree and can not see the problem. Over the next months they become relatively direct and honest and tend to see the dysfunction as needless, hurtful drama. They come to love their family members even more, and see what is going on as very human. There is no judgment or criticism, just loving, accurate observation. They frequently recognize that their parents and/or older members of the family are unlikely to change, and become good with that. Quite a change for them and quite something to watch!
