Empty Fullness 2

Sensing the empty fullness and connection of all things, which I spoke of yesterday, seems to require mediation, presence, listening and a high degree of detachment.  This is a very difficult combination, but well worth the effort and commitment.  I am reminded of the words of Joy Marsh; “there will never be a dull moment.  You will see the colors of music, hear the songs of color and be blessed with magic people”.  In my experience, everything appears and feels very much more vibrant.

Empty Fullness

During my recovery meeting tonight one of the members was talking about his experience of sensing what I call the empty fullness and wondrous nature of all living things.  When I talked to him and encouraged him after the meeting he was speaking of his deep connection with trees and his sense of their growth, roots and intimate connection with the earth.  For me, it was exciting to hear someone else waking up to that reality.  I also suggested to him that he not try to understand, define or thoroughly describe the experience, to just enjoy it.

Grieving

In talking to a client today, I was reminded of the connections we can make with dead friends and relatives.  I have used that connection, with my clients as part of the grieving process.  I might have them write a letter or simply talk to the person who has passed, expressing words that have not been said, a process that I have done myself.  I even suggest that they ask for a sign that the deceased person heard them.  The process, which assumes the deceased are still present in some way, has proved to be very cleansing for myself and others.

Connections

A day of intense emotions, numerous connections and lots of love.  The day began with a very meaningful recovery meeting during which a close friend celebrated twenty-eight years of being clean and sober.  Then Maria and I visited with another old friend who had just returned from a spiritual excursion to India.  That was followed by some intense work with the family of a recovering addict and then a celebration of several addicts completing the first phase of their recovery program.  Each of the events was an example of moving forward in love and life.  All in all, a very fulfilling and meaningful day.

My Role

I have a great deal of training and experience oriented at recovery from addictions of various sorts.  I have a good understanding of the process.  I also make a strong connection with my clients, know and understand them fairly well.  It’s important for me to realize that my ability stops there.  I do not know what is best for anyone else, which path is the best for them.  The best path for another person is between them and God.  My role is to use my training and experience to help them find their best path, without allowing my own ego to impose in any way.

Faith

The topic for today’s recovery meeting was faith and many people expressed the caution or fear that the outcome of God’s or life’s plan for them might not be either pleasant or what they had in mind.  As a result, they were resistant. When I spoke, I made it clear that I did not understand what God was and also could not see the bigger picture.  Given that, I assumed the outcome would not be what I had in mind and, as I said, that is “wonderful!”.  I do assume that the outcome will be the best for me, though I will not be surprised to not think so, when that happens.

Listening To Guidance

I am in the process of making some final changes to my book, having already made the initial arrangements for its publication.  This whole writing process has been a very intense exercise in listening to the guidance of my Higher Power/love/God, my initial inspiration for the book project.  What I do is to listen for ideas, try writing down my interpretation and adjusting until it feels right.  At present, and recently, my task is to make my recommendations stronger while staying true to the source.

Divine Intervention

I am approaching another recovery anniversary (thirty years, illegal drug and alcohol free) and as is usually the case, I am reflecting back on my journey.  When I look back I notice a great deal of divine intervention, in fact I clearly would not be alive or doing nearly as well as I am without it.  I ask for that intervention daily and have come to depend on it.  The question that occurs to me is whether the same level of intervention would be or is available to anyone who is willing to surrender their self-will completely, as is recommended in my program of recovery.  I suspect so, but I do not know.  I just know that has worked for me.

Split Wood & Carry Water

A “meat & potatoes” or “split wood & carry water” kind of a day.  Meaning that I, largely, took a break from my typical spiritual focus and spent a good part of the day taking care of simple, household tasks, like cooking and laundry.  I seem to need such breaks periodically. The day was a welcome, less intense break.  I still started my day with an extended period of prayer and meditation, which seems to be a given.

Loving Response

On the one hand, providing a loving response, acting in a loving way, sounds simple, and theoretically it is.  However, when faced with the reality of the human condition, acting in a loving way is often difficult, requiring meditation to determine the right course of action.  For example, I have a friend who is in very bad shape emotionally and physically due to his alcoholism.  My initial response is to rush to his aide in any way I can, actions that do not feel quite right.  When I meditate, the most loving response seems to be to not take any action until he begins to take some action on his own, and only then to provide support.  Meaning, that the loving response right now is to let him experience what he needs to, in spite of that being difficult to watch.  Personally, I have found the loving response to be complicated at times.