R. & R.

A good and simple sort of day with minimal heavy and meaningful interaction.  I enjoyed doing a lot of exercising, cooking, resting and eating.  I particularly enjoyed going to my recovery meeting and then going to lunch with another recovering person.  Today was sort of like a very welcome break in my normal activities of intense interaction and a focus on spiritual connection.  I suspect that I needed a break.

Grief

Once again today the theme was death, dying and loss.  As expected, I have been reflecting on the many losses that I have experienced in recent years; grandfather, parents, sister and several mentors.  The feelings and grief process for each loss were different, and what comes to mind is the importance of being open to whatever feeling arises.  I have found it helpful to carry out various activities in order to bring out the feelings. Journaling, talking, writing letters that I burned and various grief ceremonies all helped.

The Whole Picture

This morning, at the Friend’s meeting, people spoke of death, dying, loss and the destruction of our planet, all very real and good reason for concern.  I suggested that they also consider that every thought and behavior also teaches about love and God, bringing us closer to that reality.  I suggested that they look at the whole picture and consider what I call the “empty fullness” of life on this planet.  As many people have pointed out - the purpose of living is learning and growing about love.

Focus

This morning, while leaving the meeting, a friend came up alongside and spoke to me and I stumbled a bit.  He had disrupted my focus on walking.  A fact that I have been very aware of today is that, because of my disability, I need to focus on anything I say or do.  If I lose focus when I walk, I stumble, when I eat, I bite myself, when performing some detailed activity with my hands, I fumble, etc.  This fact of life is a mixed blessing, like many things in life.  It keeps me in the present, but can also be inconvenient, at times.

Being Right Sized

Today I have been contemplating on the need to stay “right sized”, to be aware of my gifts, talents and also my limitations.  If I am overly proud, I tend to not be open to the information contained in the comments of the other people I contact.  On the other hand, if I am overly self-critical, I tend to hold myself back from moving forward.  I was pleased to note that I changed my website in response to the criticism of one of my clients, meaning I listened to his comments, integrated them and acted accordingly, without pride or ego interference.

Growth

We had our monthly men’s meeting tonight and I was reminded of how important it is to have a loving, compassionate and respectful connection with others.  That connection is a beautiful thing to be part of, a definite win-win situation.  It’s wonderful to see the members of the group grow.  It has been my experience that things like guilt and shame do not promote growth and that love does.

Holistic Healing

I went to the healer I go to once a month, a hands on medical intuitive.  He uses “healing touch”, similar to what I use on myself, though my focus is more on the power of love, while his on physical healing.  I have also been reflecting on a phrase I learned early in my scientific education from a bit of a rebel, old-time scientist; “treasure your exceptions, since that is where the learning is”.  I am an exception, as are the many others who have used healing touch or other “alternative” modalities to heal physical conditions.  The impact of those techniques is very real, though it has not yet been verified by the scientific method and, perhaps, will never be.

Making a Difference

Today, I kept coming back to the phrase I learned early in my recovery process, that "Nothing matters very much and very few things matter at all".  The vast majority of the events of life that I used to worry incessantly about, actually mean little or nothing.  I kept returning to importance of love, spirituality, connectedness in what I say and do.  Those simple concepts keep me busy, fulfilled and nurture that part of me that can make a difference.

God Seed

Maria, my wife, and I attended the Friend’s (Quaker) meeting this morning.  It is good for me to be among people who recognize the importance of love, spirituality, connectedness and the oneness of all things.  They are also concerned and aware that, in some ways, this society/culture has gotten off track, leaving some ideas behind.  I find it reassuring to see evidence of what I call the “God Seed”, that part of each of us that senses the truth and importance of love, spirituality, connectedness for our conduct, decisions and interactions on this planet.

Scientific Imbalance

In the process of developing our scientific knowledge we, in the west particularly, have lost sight of many attitudes and ideas that mankind has had for hundreds and, in some cases, thousands of years, resulting in an imbalance.  As in many cases, the presence of the imbalance causes stress to the system.  I have felt that stress and experienced some of its physical consequences.  The losses include things like the importance of love, spirituality, connectedness and the oneness of all things.  Scientific knowledge is a wonderful thing and it has resulted in many gifts, but it is also limited.