Love

I find it quite remarkable that according to the scholars who have studied the life of Jesus, "His own self-understanding did not include thinking and speaking of himself as the son of God whose historical intention or purpose was to die for the sins of the world, and his message was not about believing in him. Rather, he was a spirit person, subversive sage, social prophet, and movement founder who invited his followers and hearers into a transforming relationship with the same Spirit he himself knew, and into a community whose social vision was shaped by the core value of compassion [love]." (Marcus J. Borg). Having encountered a small portion of that love myself, I have to ask "how could he have done otherwise". That love is totally consuming and transforming.

Knowing

Once again today I find myself wondering what to do with the information I have received. As I commented earlier this month, I have had numerous miraculous, numinous, sacred, God-shot experiences and am familiar with the Christian view of those experiences. Through experiences like the sweat lodge and vision quests I have explored several aspects of the Native American approach to the sacred and I also have some familiarity with the approach of other indigenous people. Through my prayer and meditation I have come to know the Buddhist perspective expressed by Jack Kornfield and Nisargadata Maharaj. I also have some familiarity with the more scientific but approaching the spiritual perspective of quantum physics. I am quite aware that they are all talking about the same thing, generally using different words. I know that all of these approaches support each other and are within the realm of knowing, not knowledge.

Acceptance

In the recovery meeting today a fellow spoke of having some serious physical problems and his need to accept life on life’s terms. When I spoke I also spoke of my own physical challenges and expressing gratitude since things could be and have been a lot worse. I also admitted having gone through some hard times, especially due to my disability. I mentioned the fact that it is difficult dealing with a body that does not "cooperate" and also that dealing with my body has led me to a better spiritual connection. My body is perfect for me.

Life Is Good.

I lead a fairly simple and extremely rewarding life based on love, my spiritual connection, connection in general, inclusiveness and being of service to my fellow travelers. I have had many difficult times and have grown from overcoming them. I have gotten and given a lot of help. I have learned to accept that I am disabled and also have the normal difficulties which result from getting old. I don’t fight any of that and I am very grateful for the many gifts I have received in the process. Life is good.

Historical Jesus & The Absolute

I have been reading about the historical Jesus who clearly had a direct experience of God that was much stronger than what I experience, but similar in some ways. As I talk about in my book, I experience that force or power as, what I call, the Absolute of unconditional love. Absolute meaning there is no criticism, judgment, requirement of obedience or anything else, just love. Jesus knew of this, generally spoke of it as compassion and felt it strongly. Following his suggestion and my own experience of God, I attempt to incorporate that in everything I do and the people I meet. That feels right.

Taking Action

Many years ago when I was a beginning social work student one of our professors told us that, as a group, we were good at advocating for other people but not ourselves. I realized he was right, took that as a challenge and decided that I would use that two year period to learn to advocate for myself and other disabled people. Without going into details, over that period I learned to quietly, politely and forcefully push for changes that made the school more handicapped friendly. I also met with considerable resistance and found out later that I had been given the nickname "the bitcher". I then realized advocating for self was not always popular with everyone and that was one reason it was not practiced. Recently I wrote and published a book not out of any sense of grandiosity or arrogance, but simply to be of service. I now find that, though many people appreciate the effort, some people are reacting negatively, reminding me of the past. In each case, I learn & grow - and will continue.

Compassion

My experience of the spirit or God is a very strong and unconditional love, which was generally spoken of by Jesus as "compassion". As Jesus said "Be compassionate as God is compassionate." and then as Borg comments "whereas purity divides and excludes, compassion unites and includes.", a message that certainly encompasses the many disenfranchised groups of today.

Difficult Times 2

Love is eternal, once begun it spreads and grows, an overwhelming and beautiful thing to be a part of. Fear-based attitudes die out and are relatively short lived while love is not. In the words of Shepherd Hoodwin "Love has a quality you can learn to discern. It 'feels right'. It is truthful and inclusive. There is no objective measurement to confirm that you are experiencing love. You can only trust your intuition and do your best. If you do, your capacity to discern love will grow. We are all learning this skill." As I commented yesterday getting through the hard times helps me to grow in love, empathy and compassion.

Difficult Times

Today, during my recovery meeting I commented that I had been "privileged" to experience difficult times during my own recovery process. The fact is that my growth has been largely due to the support and guidance I have received in order to get through the numerous difficulties I have encountered. This process reflects what I often refer to as the "empty fullness" of life. When I am in the midst of hard times, I tend to view life as empty, meaningless or even tragic. Frequently, after I get through the hard times, I realize that I have grown in love, empathy and compassion.

Spirit Person

I like the approach to God or Jesus expressed by Borg when he commented that "Finally, the image of Jesus as a spirit person has implications for how we think of the Christian life. It shifts the focus of the Christian life from believing in Jesus or believing in God to being in relationship to the same spirit that Jesus knew." I know God or love. I feel the presence and have incorporated that presence into my life, giving my life a very strong feeling of joy and fulfillment.