Trivial Difficulties

On the eleventh I commented that I generally had the options of responding to a given situation as a mature, loving adult or a hurt and angry child. Today I felt like the hurt and angry child though I did not lash out, other than expressing frustration. I have been inconvenienced because of a computer problem that has been going on every few days for close to two months. The situation was made worse by my poor communication skills. It even sounds trivial as I write that! I need to remember that "noting matters very much, and most things don’t matter at all".

Choice 2

Daily I feel and live within a very strong and unconditional love for everything and everyone, an attitude that arises through my relationship with the force I call God. Life is also very difficult for me, being older, disabled and having a speech impediment. I work constantly to balance the two - my challenge. Just the same, it is a wonderful life. I find myself wishing that others could experience the love and peace that I feel. That love and peace requires focus, concentration and de-emphasizing the importance of the recent worldly accomplishments, enjoying them but not believing in them, a way of life I suggest in my book.

Choice

Today and ever since the election I have been reflecting on lessons contained in the movie "Avatar". In that movie people with short term financial interests wanted to take over the planet, Pandora. The residents of that planet had a very spiritual and connected way of life, honoring everything and everyone on the planet. The residents had a very special relationship with a particular tree they called the "home tree". At one point one of the potential invaders commented that "it’s just a tree" and later in the movie destroyed it. The residents then threw the invaders off of the planet. Thinking of the movie as a metaphor and Earth as our Pandora, we did not throw the invaders off of the planet - we put them in charge of it, with the expected consequences. As I point out in my book, the spiritual life requires focus but is also magical, like Pandora.

Behavior Change

Yesterday my wife, Maria, got upset with me for being to abrupt, even harsh, which she took as personal criticism. I definitely was overly abrupt, though my behavior was a result of my own frustration over my poor communication and not directed at her. I kept thinking of a phrase that I have heard in recovery meetings "if I am not at fault, there is no solution". I modified my behavior to be more pleasant. Today we dealt with a difficult bureaucracy (M.V.A.!) and I maintained a pleasant, less abrupt attitude for which she commended me. My challenge now is to keep it up.

Humanity

Today I became lost, frustrated and angry because of my efforts and eventual failure to navigate through technology, supposed technological advances. This condition is short-term, trivial and will pass shortly but is increasingly common in a world that is becoming more technological and lacking the love I mentioned yesterday and speak of in my book. On the other hand there was the young man who stopped to offer me help this afternoon, the laughter of the plumber who fixed my toilet and the love of my wife. This was a day of contrasting options and my choice is obvious.

My Approach

I am not very political since politics does not meet the need, nor is it responsive to the general public. I care, very passionately, about all people and this earth that supports us. Recent events in this country are and have been very reactive and fear-based, an approach that I used with limited success for many years. I now use a love-based approach, which I explain in my book, Three Simple Questions: Being in the World, But Not of It. My approach is based on three questions to consider when planning any sort of activity. The questions are: would I do this in front of God, or whatever you call that power/force?; is my name really on it or is it really my responsibility?; will this increase the integrity of the universe, or is this loving? I wrote and published the book as part of my effort to change the world.

Healing

It is clear to me that the world is in need of healing and that it will come about through loving responses like the second option I spoke of yesterday. Lashing out and being angry is easy, being loving is not. However, "My experience is that the second option feels a great deal better and adds to the integrity of the universe. It is also my experience that acting out of love causes others to do the same." Love is a force and it spreads.

Choice

In my case it is quite clear that I have a choice between two potential approaches to most situations, and that the two responses are quite different. The first option is to act as if I am a hurt and angry child and in that case my response is likely to be some form of lashing out at the person or situation. The second option is to take the approach of a loving, compassionate, empathic adult and in that case my response is likely to be constructive and supportive. The various video clips suggest that our president elect has both sides as well. My experience is that the second option feels a great deal better and adds to the integrity of the universe. It is also my experience that acting out of love causes others to do the same.

Addressing Anger

People on all sides of the political spectrum are expressing anger which is actually rooted in fear and hurt. The fear and hurt is frequently caused by either some form of oppression or the fact that, economically, they are not doing well, both quite understandable. This was clearly expressed in the recent election and can result in violence and divisiveness if a person remains at the level of anger and its expression. On the other hand, if we can focus on the hurt and fear at the root of the anger, we can address the anger with love and compassion. If we focus on the anger we are likely to stay angry. However if we focus on the fear and hurt we may come to a resolution.

Healing 2

Since the election I have seen strong expressions of fear, anger, love, compassion, togetherness, concern about the environment and a "wait-and-see attitude. We need the love and healing. I like the approach suggested by Walsch several years ago "Embrace every circumstance, own every fault, share every joy, contemplate every mystery, walk in every man’s shoes, forgive every offense (including your own), heal every heart, honor every person’s truth, adore every person’s God, protect every person’s rights, preserve every person’s dignity, promote every person’s interests, provide every person’s needs, presume every person’s holiness, present every person’s greatest gifts, produce every person’s blessing, and pronounce every person’s future secure in the assured love of God."