Growth

The process of promoting my book and myself stirs me up since I am not good at being “out there”.  However, promotion is necessary if I really wish to have an impact on many people.  As I said a few days ago “ I am good and comfortable with being quiet, peaceful, in the background and somewhat self-effacing”.  It’s time to get out of my comfort zone.  I need to learn to do that in a way that is in harmony with being Charlie.  I can do that if I pray, meditate, ask for guidance and do the next right thing.

A Change of Approach

I look around me and note that most people take actions based on the fear of undesirable outcomes rather than simply doing the “right” or most loving thing.  I also notice that many people try to use material possessions to take the place of spiritual connections or connections with each other.  I must confess that I have tried both, repeatedly.  Having tried both and in observing many other people it is quite apparent to me that neither approaches result in any sort of long-term peace or serenity.  I now choose to act out of love and have numerous heart-felt connections each day.

Self-care

During periods of stress like this, when I am doing things outside of my comfort zone, I need to be especially careful with my self-care, monitoring my condition and doing everything I can to stay balanced.  I seem to do pretty well with some of the standard things like enough sleep, maintaining a healthy diet, prayer, meditation and daily exercise.  The activities that I need to be careful with are my social interactions, relationships and asking for help or support.  I still have a slight tendency to isolate during times of stress and a desire to do things on my own.  Since I am normally providing service to others, they actually appreciate it when I ask for help - and it feels good to me too.

My Comfort Zone

I spoke today to a person about doing what I can to truly promote my book.  The conversation terrified me.  I am good and comfortable with being quiet, peaceful, in the background and somewhat self-effacing, all attitudes which will not promote my book.  I realize that in order to maximize the impact of my book I need to step out of those attitudes, at least for a while.  The words of Williamson come to mind “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.  Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.  It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.”

Paradigm Shift

As I indicated two days ago, it is likely to me that truly elucidating things like healing touch, intuition or the power of unconditional love, will not be accomplished using science or the scientific method.  Understanding those very real but ethereal things will require a different paradigm than science or scientific inquiry, if it is to be accomplished at all.  I am reminded of the words of Targ and Katra that “We have learned that analysis is the enemy of psi.”  For now, I am quite content to make use of these things in my day to day life without really understanding them.  Acting without thinking or analyzing is fun and challenging.

Healing Touch

Today I worked with a person using healing touch and the power of unconditional love, a wonderful experience for them and me.  I thought of my comment yesterday about my desire to “not let science hold me back”.  I have a Ph.D. in biology, giving me a scientific background, and, as a result, I really admire and enjoy the efficacy of scientific investigation.  It is also important for me to realize that science is limited.  For example, in this case, science can establish that healing touch works, but it cannot explain how or illuminate the importance of unconditional love in the healing process.  I still use it daily.

Attitude

I went to another workshop today.  This workshop was on “The Habits Of Happy People” and, as usual, I found it pleasing to hear people talk about the physical impact and importance of things like attitude, resiliency factors and meditation, things that I learned about and have been using for years.  I realize that the scientific community and I are just scratching the surface and that many others have known about the importance of these activities for centuries.  I will continue to explore and not let science hold me back, also realizing its importance.

Obsessing

Tonight at my recovery meeting I spoke about my experience with my tendency to obsess about events in my life.  Earlier today I went into obsession about the book I am in the process of publishing and promoting.  Basically, the process was not going according to my plan and I was obsessing about potential actions and things I could say to make everything fit my plan.  In this case, my obsessing only lasted 1 & ½ or 2 hours, pretty good since obsessing and efforts to control used to occupy my thoughts.  What I did was begin meditating, asking myself “how important is it” and feeling the peace and love of knowing that everything was just fine.

Acting In A Sacred Manner

It is clear to me that all the activities in my life should be done in what various native people would call a “sacred manner”.  Meaning to constantly be aware that all of my actions effect or “feed” the eternal part of me and that everything I do is connected to the rest of the world.  That sounds daunting but it really just means to act out of love and respect for all things, or to honor myself and my position on this earth.  Within that approach it is certainly possible to enjoy and take pleasure in the various distractions provided by wealth and technology but not place much importance on those things.

Love-based Living

A central purpose of the book I just wrote & published is as a guide to help people live and identify with the eternal, love-based part inside each of them, which I mentioned yesterday. As I say in the book, it is being “in the world but not of it”, meaning not identifying with the capitalistic, competitive, individualistic or fear-based part of each of us.  The love-based approach has certainly changed my life.  In the book I outline many of the activities I use daily to keep me on that path, actions that I also describe in this blog.