Shadow Side

In my recovery meetings recently there has been a fellow who is probably in his mid-fifties, overweight, outspoken and with only about four months of recovery. He is also very self-centered and does not listen well. When he speaks, no matter what he actually says I hear the hidden message of "won’t someone please listen to me!". As he mentions whenever he shares he has actually been working on recovery for thirty four years, about as long as me but I have not relapsed. I mention him because his presence bothers me — He represents my "shadow" side, the part of me that I would rather not admit to. To use another common phrase "There, but for the grace of God, go I". On most days I look at him with a mixture of irritation, love and compassion. "Doing shadow-work means making a gentleman's agreement with one's self to engage in an internal conversation that can, at some time down the road result in an authentic self-acceptance and a real compassion for others." (Zweig and Abrams)