Vibrancy of Spring

Yesterday we (mostly Maria, I watched and made comments) put up a bluebird house and today it was being checked out by a male bluebird. If he approves he will show it to a female and she will have final say. The plants in the gardens are getting ready to bloom. Buds on bushes and trees are swelling and getting ready to burst forth. According to the plants and animals spring is here and it feels wonderful. According to the Thomas gospel, Jesus says that this primordial light not only brought the entire universe into being but still shines through everything we see and touch.

My Role

I model my life according to what I know of Christ, yet some people would not consider me Christian and I attend Quaker meetings yet I am not a Quaker. I consider such exclusivity to be a silly part of humanity — not of God — OK for many, but not me. God’s Love is Absolute and Unconditional without any such artificial requirements or conditions. I Love and honor God and God does the same for me and others. I do enjoy the silent worship of Quaker meetings and I identify with much of the mystical tradition of the Friends. I am Charlie and I spread Love as much as I can.

Empathy

In contrast to yesterday, today was a good day. I went to a recovery meeting, watched a movie, talked to a person I work with, exercised, meditated and napped, a good balance of activities. As an energetic empath I have to be careful about taking on and being affected by the negative energy of others, staying clear about what is mine and theirs. If I start feeling bad for no reason, it helps me let the feeling go when I say to myself "this is not mine". Having done that yesterday, today I felt clear and positive.

Rough Day

Today was a rough day for me. I woke up as a "creaky old man" (aches and pains with difficulty moving around) which improved for a while and then worsened until I was completely debilitated this afternoon and finally began to improve this evening. Physically I needed to take on salt and water in order to restore my salt/water/fluid balance. I also meditated to find out if there was anything emotional or spiritual going on and I realized that I had been empathically taking on some negative energy from the spirits and living humans I contact. I needed to focus on encapsulating that energy in love and then releasing it "like a fart", very cleansing. Now I think it’s time for bed.

Connection

Tonight during my meditation and feeling the strength, power and Love of that connection I was acknowledging both how good and vital the contact was and also how fragile it was. Part of my humanity is that I often wish for more "money, power or prestige", yet I am also aware that if I had more worldly success I would tend to get lost in it and loose or reduce my connection. For example, to date my book has sold around a hundred copies and I fantasize about it being more successful, while realizing that even thinking about more success challenges me. So, my connection is strong but it is also fragile.

Ministry

For some reason, which is not clear to me, the spirits at and around the Friend’s meeting house in Sandy Spring, MD are pivotal to my work with spirits. What I do with the spirits I encounter is to radiate Love and dispel their negative thoughts and feelings. I then suggest they influence the living by doing the same thing, energetically. My plan is to shift the energetic balance from the negative, anger and hurt into a more loving direction. The spirits around Sandy Spring are leaders in the process and they inform me that the work is having an impact.

Holistic Healing

Today I was with someone who had fallen and could not get up. In response my subconscious automatically went into healing mode and I could feel the healing energy being drawn out of me and sent to her. She then got up with the aide of a chair. I usually generate and channel a healing energy based on love and God which I then direct through my hands to whatever needs healing. In this case the healing was done without thought or intent on my part, It felt like I was a merely a tool in the process. Understanding is not required!

Spiritual Growth

My intuitive sense is that it is now time for me to expand what I do, say and believe as far as spiritual matters. I am doing that by going past my intellect which deals with logic, reason and knowledge, very limiting and limited. I then venture, largely through meditation, into the realm of simple knowing and intuition using my listening skills and allowing myself to feel lost which sounds simple but it is certainly not easy. I have to shut down my intellect in order to proceed. "To understand better the value of silence in daily life, and its relation to this spiritual transformation for which we yearn, it is useful first to consider the limitation of language, of words. It is next useful to contemplate the limitations of logical reasoning." (Daniel A. Seeger)

My Role

I understand that anyone and everyone can feel and live within God’s kingdom, the feeling of Love, power, peace and presence, to the degree that they commit themselves to being in it. In my case I spend time each day in worship and am consciously aware of the kingdom 24/7. Most people do not have that level of commitment, which seems to be OK (though not in my case). I encounter many people who admire my commitment and the results — but are also unwilling to commit themselves to that degree. I will do everything I can to help them feel and live within the Love regardless. I gather that is my role.

Distraction

Tonight I was doing my "daily devotion" as described yesterday and focusing on the positive or loving aspects of the grief process when I got distracted and temporarily lost my connection. I am struck by how easy it is to become distracted. I could feel the Loving presence and strong connection as I recalled the deep, loving, sadness I felt after various losses in my life and a recognition of their eternal nature. It felt sad but in a very positive, forward moving way. Then I turned on my computer and began looking at some current events with the result that my connection evaporated — temporarily. Distraction is very easy to do!