Growth

  In my own quiet way I continue to explore and expand my notions of healing, my position in the universe and reality in general.  I do this largely through meditation and my own practices.  Recently, my main explorations have been in the spirit realm, healing and what I call the “unseen realm”.  I continue to explore, in part, because I get positive results.  What I do and believe works so I suspect there is something there.  I have always liked the phrase from Martin Bell that "Revelation means getting a peek at the reality that is always there."  I also keep in mind that "There are many territories of imagination and many strange regions of emotion that we may not enter without throwing our sanity into question: Until we cross some borders, we are likely to remain rational, banal, boring, bored. A major concern of any therapeutic psychology should be to help an individual lose identity." (Sam Keen and Anne Valley-Fox).

Self-care

  I feel and act out of love daily if I am in decent emotional and spiritual condition which requires self-care and introspection.  I also have as part of me a selfish and fearful side, which does not get expressed and usually is not even felt.  Yesterday the comments of other people on Zoom reminded me that I feel that part when I’m not taking care of myself.  I grew up feeling and expressing that part since it was all I knew.  I did not enjoy feeling that way and nether did the people around me.  My recovery has shown me a more loving and spiritual approach to life which I much prefer.

Love

    God’s love which I felt so strongly during my N.D.E. is absolute and unconditional, meaning it is always there and available to everyone.  That love is the same whether you are Jesus or the person nailing him to the cross, Mother Teresa or Hitler.  That love made me decide to come back to the physical world.  That love provides healing of all types.  This world is full of hate, fear, anger and aggression which will create more of the same no matter how it is expressed and no matter how justified it seems.  Love will do the same so I choose love.  I can do no less.

Understanding?

  For the last day and right now it has been occurring just how much I do not really understand what I am doing each day.  I believe that I work mainly in the spirit realm and its impact on living people but am aware even that could be an active imagination.  My understanding is that within the spirit realm there is an atmosphere of God’s love which is absolute and unconditional so there is no duality as in our realm.  The spirit realm is also non-material or physical so conditions there are beyond my understanding.  My task seems to be to spread that love as much as possible which I do daily and beyond that I do not understand — but then “understanding is not required”.

Love

  During my Near-Death-Experience I was told “This is what it feels like to be dead” and I felt the indescribably intense and beautiful Love of God which other NDErs have also experienced.  The love that I experienced then and have come to know through meditation is both  absolute and unconditional, meaning it is always present and exhibits none of the fluctuation or duality of human love.  I do not pretend to understand it, but do feel it and now live within that love.  “The kingdom of God is not coming with signs that can be observed, nor will they say; ‘Look here it is!’ or ‘There it is!’ for the kingdom of God is within you.” (gospel of Luke)

Holistic Healing

  In 1988 during a clinical trial shortly after being diagnosed with cerebellar degeneration, a chronic degeneration of the cerebellum, I discovered that I could override an “involuntary” reflex by using meditation.  The technician running the experiment became quite upset when I did not exhibit the expected response so I stopped using meditation when undergoing experiments. Shortly after this I found that I could influence (later control) my muscle activity using the level of focus I had during meditation.  At the same time I found that I could use the power of love/God to heal myself physically.  I have using and expanding on those techniques ever since and have taught them to others.

Gifts

This morning I am especially aware that I have several special “gifts” from God/Universe which I have come to depend on daily.  The foundation for those gifts is a close connection with God and the people I work with.  I can sense eternity, God’s Love and guidance and many things about other people.  That connection adds a sense of purpose and fullness to my life.  Offshoots of that connection include; knowing things, self-healing, healing of others and a sense of well-being.  I cannot say that I worry about losing those gifts but I feel reassured when I see evidence of their presence in my life, which I have seen recently.  As if to increase my awareness, those gifts were taken from me for part of a day a few years ago — a horrible feeling.  I am grateful for their presence.

 

Acceptance

  The roads around my house are snow covered since it is twenty-two degrees and snowed yesterday.  Today seems like a good day to be peaceful, quiet and stay at home doing some exercise, cleaning and cooking.  Yesterday I talked with someone who’s refrigerator is not working, reminding me that I can also be grateful for having a warm house with working appliances.  As is usually the case, my best option is to peacefully accept the reality of what is and go about enjoying my day.

Listening

  Today I feel “solid”, not positive but more neutral which means that I was able to listen clearly yesterday and act accordingly.  Yesterday I felt the need for sorting/contemplative time which I did until that time was complete (three hours).  I took the time to sit and do absolutely nothing, which is hard for me since I have an internal voice that interferes with my listening by urging me to be active, to do things.  Nothing has really changed, the world is still in chaos and I still have assorted joint pain but I feel good about being able to listen about my own needs.

Sorting Time

  This morning I am feeling a pull to have more “sorting” time for myself, time to do nothing but sit and contemplate my life with no distractions like TV or radio.  It’s a feeling of being slightly off center, a feeling of things not being quite right.  It’s not that I am busy at all — I am not.  I just need a lot of quiet, sorting time in order to feel well balanced..  That will be easy to arrange all I need is the discipline necessary — no problem. “It [inner silence] is to establish an inner peace, an inner harmony, which will allow us authentically to contribute to the establishment of an outer peace and an outer harmony in the world at large.” (Seeger)